Diary of a content creator

I thought it might be fun to start streaming. One day in 2016, after getting motivated by prominent streamers TangoTek, impulseSV, and CohhCarnage, I finally decided to see whether I would actually enjoy it. I streamed Minecraft from my PlayStation 4 that day and got a handful of followers. I believe at one point there were double digits people watching.

I then set up my PC to be a streaming box (switching over from Linux to Windows 10 in the process) and a week later, I streamed to Beam for the first time from my PC. I would like to say I found quick success but that wasn’t entirely true. There were many days when the only viewer I had was my wife, Eve.

When Final Fantasy XV released, I decided I’d stream it for 12 hours, expecting to be engrossed in it for at least that long. One of the advantages of being in Hawaiʻi is that midnight releases for games tend to happen on either Pacific or Eastern time zones, which can be as early as 6 p.m. for us.

It was during this stream that I gained the first of my long-time supporters, who was watching from across the globe in Germany. Not long afterward, during a Minecraft stream, a viewer — would would later become my first moderator and BFF — stumbled upon my stream. Without these two giving me confidence, who knows what would have happened? I am eternally grateful for their support.

Fast forward to my birthday in February, I got a rather large raid from TangoTek and impulseSV, who were — as I mentioned — inspirations for me starting to stream, so this was a huge deal to me. I gained quite a few long-term friends and followers that night, which helped spark my channel’s growth.

Partnership

Things started to take off rather quickly after that. Within a few months, I had gained enough of an independent following to consider applying for partnership. After pulling the trigger and filling out the application, I made it past the first stage of review within a few days. After what seemed like forever (I just checked the email dates, it was only three and a half weeks) I was asked to schedule an interview. Due to scheduling conflicts and time zone issues, this took another week.

I got the acceptance email on September 5th, and promptly filled out the necessary paperwork. I was in the midst of an IRL crisis, so it wasn’t until the 11th that everything was official but I was elated with getting some recognition for my hard work put into the channel. I decided to delay the official announcement until the 14th, which would have been my late father’s birthday. I remember crying during that stream.

Thus began an interesting next two years.

Here, I should note that Microsoft had acquired Beam, and had just recently announced a name change to Mixer. It was a little strange to suddenly be in a partnership with Microsoft, but that opened up a lot of doors. I was invited to various PAX conferences, to E3 in Los Angeles, Microsoft HQ in Seattle, and I had my own booth at Minefaire (a fan-organized convention surrounding Minecraft).

I got to play games before they came out. I got to meet up with many of my streaming friends from the platform and also got to make many new ones! At one event, I even had a meet-up with 10 or so of my viewers from my stream. Having to travel from Hawaiʻi to the mainland for each of these, things became somewhat hectic but extremely fun.

Every so often, you have a once-in-a-lifetime experience. For me, I had several of them within this time period. I was invited by Minecraft to join several of their live streams on location from their Microsoft studio, where I was able to show off my server, OhanaCraft. I was invited to get access to some alpha games before they were even announced to the public.

I was able to guest produce for Verena Mei (who was in Rush Hour 2 and Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift). Joe Hills from HermitCraft invited me to guest star in a YouTube video. I met professional wrestler AJ Styles. Perhaps my favorite experience was during an impromptu Minecraft 10-year anniversary celebration. I was able to live stream portions of the event from my phone, during which I interviewed various folks working on Minecraft, Marketplace Partners, and some big name YouTubers, such as the wonderful GoodTimesWithScar.

The 2019 coronavirus pandemic hits

While enjoyable, all this travel probably took a toll on me. By June 2020, I was feeling run down and my mental health had deteriorated due to concerns over the handling over the COVID pandemic. I effectively locked myself inside, and for someone who had spent the previous few years outside training for — and participating in — several marathons and half marathons, this was a complete one-eighty.

Honestly, COVID gave me a high level of anxiety. This is something I have only confided to one person other than my wife, but I was on anti-anxiety medications and SSRIs. It was at this point that Microsoft shocked the entire Mixer community (and even its employees) by announcing they were simply going to shut it down. They were done. We were done. I was done.

So, with COVID and Mixer shutdown happening, you’d probably forgive me for not being in a great state mentally. We also had to move apartments because our rent was going up at the old place, which was a tipping point for me.

As wonderful 2017-2019 were for me, 2020-2022 seemed to be the opposite. I basically didn’t even feel like posting status updates because it was just so overwhelming and stress-inducing to think about. But that couldn’t prepare me for what would happen next.

I was simply just shifting on the couch while watching a movie with Eve, when I felt a massive blow to my left side. I was completely knocked over, and was dazed and couldn’t really think straight. I couldn’t stand up. I tried to convey the pain in my left chest, which worked because Eve called 911. I was rushed off to the hospital, wondering if I was going to die (spoiler alert: I didn’t).

I was diagnosed with a pinched nerve, which just so happened to be in the precise location to give me symptoms warranting my first ever ride in an ambulance. The medical staff were really good at keeping me as calm as possible given the circumstances, but I can honestly say I do not recommend being in that situation.

The road goes ever on and on

With a new lease on life, and enough time after the move passing to have gotten most of my computer set up done, the calendar had just turned to September, and I knew what needed to be done.

Once again, I streamed on the 14th in celebration of my Mixer partnership anniversary, which itself was chosen on that date to honor my late father. And the next few days I felt… unwell. I casually said I should test for COVID and Eve jokingly agreed. She was not joking however, when she told me it was positive.

I was stupefied: I had been so careful and took extra precautions when going out and had avoided catching it thus far. How could this have happened? We isolated immediately into different rooms and I didn’t schedule any more streams.

My physician prescribed PAXLOVID for me, which is supposed to suppress the virus and lessen its effects. I thought it worked as I felt better within a few days. I scheduled various streams for October. And then I kept getting worse. My voice was gone by the first week of October. Swallowing was difficult, and I had a persistent cough. Various trips to urgent care followed but none were able to fix things.

My name is Miles, and I have Long COVID. It is real and I am still recovering. This has been a long ordeal for Eve and myself. The disruption to my voice was severe enough that we have learned some basic sign language for communication.

All is not lost though! As of this writing, I am beginning to see signs of a lasting improvement.

I hope to make a full return to streaming soon. I miss it for the wonderful people who join me, I miss it for the wonderful games I play on stream, and I miss it for me. I need to get back to it for my sanity’s sake.

I need to get back to it because I enjoy it.